Friday, September 12, 2014

The Best Kind of Work

“It’s impossible for us to find a perfect spouse if we model him or her toward someone, atau toward our own sets of criteria. The world just doesn’t work that way. We’re not God yang bisa bikin orang yang sempurna, sesuai dengan semua yang kita mau. But we can try to find someone that just works. That when you and that someone are together, you both just work. Despite all the hiccups and each other’s shortcomings and imperfections and flaws. Banyak yang mau gue ubah, sama seperti banyak dari gue yang pasti dia juga mau ubah. Countless. Banyak banget. Tapi terus, mau nunggu kami bisa mengubah each other dulu according to our ideal mindset baru bisa nerima? Nggak, kan? Terus, kalau emang kami berdua berubah sesuai yang diinginkan masing-masing, are we still the same person we both fall in love with? Jadi stop trying to find the perfect spouse according to your own ideal. Just find someone who just works with you. That’s all that matters. Relationship is work. I learned this the hard way. You should love someone in spite of, not because of.”
—Ika Natassa, Twivortiare

Setelah sekian lama menjalani The Journey of Finding the One, akhirnya baru sadar 1 hal: relationship is a teamwork. Butuh 2 orang yang sama-sama mau untuk bekerja menjalankan suatu hubungan, karena hubungan itu usaha.
Hubungan itu kerja keras.
Chance buat nemuin orang yang nyentang semua kriteria yang udah kita buat tuh 1 in a million ya. Atau dengan kata lain, nggak mungkin. There will always be things you don't like about your partner. Itu bisa dipastiin. Dan sama, buat dia kitapun begitu.
Relationship is about re-adjusting our standards. Memaklumi kekurangan pasangan, walaupun kedengerannya gampang, tapi ternyata nggak juga. Because sadly, humans are built with ego.
Pengennya ini-itu yang sempurna. Mau dicari ke ujung duniapun nggak akan pernah ketemu. Pushing all the good and nice guys away in order to find the perfect guy. But there's no such thing as perfect guy! Dan kalo kejadiannya gini terus, I will end up alone.
Kalo inget-inget hubungan yang kemarin-kemarin, baru sadar ternyata I gave up most of my relationship. At some point I stopped trying. Dan itu nggak boleh.
Because once again, relationship is the work of two people.

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