Saturday, December 31, 2011

Bonne Année!

"Think back and replay your year; if it doesn’t bring you tears of either joy or sadness, consider it wasted."
-Ally McBeal-

I can't believe today is the last day of this year. Last day of 2011.
It has been a hell of a year. Some went good, some didn't. You know, life.
I'm so grateful that I got accepted into college, or I think I am, I don't know I just haven't figured that yet. But college brought me some new friends, those incredible people. And meeting them was, I think, the best thing happened to me this year.
The worst thing happened to me was that I graduated from high school. That I had to say goodbye to a place that had given me so much to learn. And all those memories. Those friends of mine, classmates, the boys, and all the corny things of high school... You guys are, sure as hell, gonna stay in me, forever. You remember that, okay?
And there were some things which, well, I kinda regret. That wasn't the best of me. I'll do better, promise.
I have so many hopes for next year, of course. But since I have final exams 3 days from now, let's work on that first. And, no, I don't think I'll have new year's resolution this year. Because I will likely forget those in a week. I've learned my lesson, ha! I'll just go with the wind. Oh yeaah I'm actually saying that
Anyway, have a great new year's eve (while I'm gonna spend mine watching some corny romance movies)! May you have a better year ahead!
Happy new year, x

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Me Going Dark and Twisty

I don't know why do my love life suck. And it's a funny thing to say since I'm only 19 years old and I'm talking about love. But it still is a relationship, so it still is love, and it still does hurt.
Look, I'm 19 years old and I've been in 6 relationships with 6 different people. Is it so wrong for me to look for a stable relationship? It's not like I'm gonna marry someone tomorrow or looking someone I'm gonna spend the rest of my life or something. It's just...stable relationship seems working on me and my creepy love life. I just need someone who's gonna stick around, no such thing as running away. I'm not a big fan of chasing. I need someone who's gonna stay. I need someone who is single, not a kind-of-single, but literally single, no girl going crazy over him, because I'm so freakin done dealing with that kind of crap. I just need someone who's not gonna make me end up saying "MY LOVE LIFE SUCKS!" And I definitely need someone who's gonna make me laugh over this post and try to remember what did I think when I decided to write this stupid post in the first place.

Saturday, November 5, 2011

Tik...tok...

Sudah sejam ia duduk dan menunggu, sendiri di halte yang bising, mulai bosan. Sesekali ia mendangak ketika ia melihat bus, yang ternyata, hanya lewat. Terkadang ia memandang kesal sambil lalu ketika bus berhenti di depannya, bus dengan tujuan lain. Dan suatu ketika ia berseri saat bus yang ia tunggu muncul, seketika terhentak dari tempat duduknya, setengah melompat, bersiap menaiki bus yang ternyata penuh, tak menyisakan satu tempat pun untuknya. Bus itu lalu menghambur pergi, seakan mengejek.
Ia lalu kembali duduk dan menunggu, entah sampai kapan, karena bagaimanapun...ia harus pulang.

Saturday, October 22, 2011

What I've been dealing with lately

Hi! Been a while, rite?
There are too much going on with my life right now you know. College...seniors...friends...love.
Yep. I'm a college student now. Been 2 months, I think. I kinda enjoy it, I mean even with all those tasks, I get to learn new things from zero and meet new friends and start a new way of living, it's all just challenging for me.
But yes, college is not all about joy. There are other things that, well, suck. Like the orientation period. At my college, that's kinda complicated and energy-and-time-consuming being a freshmen. The only reason  I'm dong this is just because I get to be with my friends all the time and it just feels nice.
And even though I love my new friends, like really really do, I still miss my high school friends. Oh God they're just the best. It's different you know, what I have with them. It's like we understand each other without having the need to say anything. I miss them, like all the time. And it sucks that we always find it hard to meet each other because of our clashed schedule.
Oh...love...you know how friggin many times I talk about this? I'm so done. I've had enuffff

PS: This is satnite and I'm doing tasks. Okay this is creepy

Sunday, September 11, 2011

Did I mention that they're awesome?

First week of college? Hectic.
I never thought it'd be this energy-consuming. We have like billion tasks to do. And it's just the beginning. Who knows what we'd be given next week? More paper? More exams? More research? Geez.
Some of my friends have gone crazy just because the academic tasks. Not to mention the tasks given by our senior. Mad mad mad week.
But thanks God, at least, we're all in this together. After that crazy week, I spent the whole Saturday with them. And all the pressure just disappeared. Like nothing happened. Hearing them laughing at things which weren't funny at all, I found that as a funny thing, which was relaxing. And I love how they make thing simpler than it really is. I love how they make me laugh even when it seems impossible to.
"Why do you look so sad? Tell us. That's what friends are for," they said. I know it sounds cliche, I know it sounds like they're reading a line in a song or something. But it sounds just fine for me. It sounds calming for me.
God I love them.

Sunday, August 7, 2011

A lesson for me, noted

"So keep your head high, keep your chin up, and most importantly, keep smiling, because life's a beautiful thing and there's so much to smile about."--Marilyn Monroe
Look at us. Look at how many times we're being so ungrateful about our life. We curse life, we get mad at things which don't work out, we yelled at people just because we're having a bad day, and some other things. Look at what we've done. Look at how much negative energy coming out from our soul.
Why don't we make things simple? Why don't we keep calm and see what's gonna happen next? Why don't we just go with the flow?
Life's short. Too short you don't notice it's coming to its end.
It's Ramadhan, people. What a perfect time to be a brand-new-even-better person!
Spread the positive things, spread the love.
Happy holly-days! :-)

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

3 tahun

3 tahun. Kurang lebih 3 tahun. 3 tahun waktu yang dihadiahkan Allah untuk aku nikmati bersama mereka. 3 tahun yang kalau aku ceritakan di sini, mungkin Blogger akan menerbitkan tulisanku menjadi novel karena terlalu panjang, siapa yang tahu. 3 tahun yang tidak akan pernah sukses aku gambarkan dalam rangkaian huruf dan kata. 3 tahun yang kalau aku ceritakan secara lisan, mulutku akan berbuih lalu aku dilarikan ke rumah sakit karena radang pita suara. 3 tahun yang...

Aku tidak akan menuliskan peristiwa atau kejadian atau pengalaman yang telah aku alami bersama mereka, karena mungkin tidak akan menarik untuk kalian. Karena jariku akan kaku pada akhirnya. Karena...kisah itu hanya milik kami.

Aku cuma ingin menggambarkan apa arti mereka buatku.

....Apa ya arti mereka buatku?
Aku tak tahu, apakah ada di dunia ini paket lengkap kombinasi antara sahabat + kekasih + keluarga, tapi kurang lebih, itulah gambaranku tentang mereka. Bagaikan paket komplit yang aku tahu aku tak berhak meminta yang lebih, karena mereka sudah berlebihan untukku, dalam arti yang baik tentu saja.
Sahabat...karena mereka selalu ada. Dalam naik turunnya hidupku, dalam prosesku menuju, entahlah, orang bilang namanya kedewasaan. Mereka selalu di sana. Suka atau tidak, mereka selalu dan akan tetap di sana.
Kekasih...bagiku kekasih adalah orang yang akan selalu mendukung kita, di setiap situasi, ketika kita di atas, maupun ketika kita terjerembap di bawah. Kekasih, menurutku, adalah orang yang membuat kita selalu merasa cantik, merasa istimewa. Dan itulah yang dilakukan mereka. Mereka mendukungku, meski aku kadang tak paham juga dengan jalan pikiranku. Dan mereka membuatku merasa istimewa, bahkan ketika orang lain tak menyadari adanya aku.
Keluarga...kamu tahu? Keluarga adalah tempat dimana kamu tidak harus berusaha. Tidak harus berusaha untuk menjadi apa yang orang inginkan, berusaha menjadi sosok yang sama sekali bukan kamu. Effortless. Bersama mereka itu effortless. Mudah semudah bernafas. Aku ingat jelas kata mama, "Dalam hidup, nantinya akan ada mantan teman, mantan kekasih, bahkan mantan suami...tapi tidak akan pernah kamu menemui mantan saudara, mantan keluarga. Tidak akan pernah." Dan bersama mereka...aku tahu mamaku benar.

3 tahun. Waktu yang panjang...namun juga waktu yang sangat pendek. Terlalu cepat rasanya waktu itu berjalan. Belum habis tawaku, belum juga habis air mataku. Seakan menagih, untuk ku habiskan lagi bersama mereka.
Namun mungkin, Allah punya rencana yang lebih baik untukku dan untuk mereka. Kamu tahu sendiri kan, yang sedikit itu yang spesial. Yang sebentar itu yang akan selalu kamu ingat. Mungkin Allah memang sengaja memberikan waktu yang singkat supaya itu terkenang, supaya itu tetap spesial.

Kami mungkin memang tak lagi bersama secara raga. Kami dipisahkan oleh jarak, oleh mimpi kami masing-masing. Tapi aku tau kami tidak terpisah secara batin. Di hati, hatiku paling tidak, kami tetap satu. Tetap 28 siswa-siswi berseragam putih abu-abu yang menangis dan tertawa bersama. Dan akan tetap seperti itu.

Suatu saat nanti, ketika kami dipertemukan lagi. Ketika kami sudah menjadi raja dalam mimpi kami masing-masing, kami akan mengingat 3 tahun ini. 28 orang dari kami akan mengenang 3 tahun dan sejuta ceritanya, lalu tertawa bersama.

Karena...3 tahun ini untuk selamanya.

Spesial, untuk 27 orang sahabat, kekasih, dan keluargaku...
Abyan Irzaldy, Adhgha Nizar, Aditya Sita Sari, Agassi Ramadhan, Agi Arbianto, Anya Azaria, Arkanty Septyvergy, Bagus Wibowo, Binar Larasanti, Cicilia Deandra, Deddy Laudryansyah, Diah Ariesa, Dikstra Dhyaksatama, Hesty Rohmatul, I Made Artha, Ibnu Surya, Jeconia Agrippina, Junjungan Manggalacakti, Made Pury, Mirza Suryo Adi, Muhammad Muzakky, Putri Fary, Rachmat Calief, Taufiqur Rahman, Wicaksono Indra, Yugi Pratama, Zuhroni Ali Fikri.